Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Joyous Kwanzaa, Happy (Belated) Hanukkah, Happy Winter Solstice

Or whatever doesn’t offend you, because that seems to have become a thing again this year. I really don’t care what greeting I receive, it’s just nice (most of the time) for someone to take a few seconds in their day to acknowledge my presence. There is 1 hour and 15 minutes left on this Christmas night. I had a good Christmas, Santa (or my mom) was super generous and I got to see my grandparents and my aunt. My mom made a really good dinner, per usual, and it was overall a good holiday.

As a little Christmas special, I wrote a living tribute to Shirali Y. Patel.

Literally a living tribute, because she is indeed still alive. I promised earlier in the year I would write her eulogy so I thought I should start working on it, you know, just in case….

Shirali Y. Patel. What can I say about Shirali Y. Patel. Not her middle name. I can’t say that about Shirali Y. Patel. But at this point, everyone probably already knows it because everyone with the last name Patel *cough* Shirali and Jahnavi *cough* cannot keep a secret. Shirali is well known for her baby hairs, neutral colored clothing, and collection of unique phrases such as: “Ain’t nobody got time for that,” “I like you,” “If you were a boy I’d date you” (to either gender), “Frick,” “The struggle is real,” “God dang it,” “Oh my god(s),” You’re a cutie,” "I ain't about that life" and the ever controversial “You’re a classy broad". Although sometimes asleep, or doing homework through it, Shirali spent many hours in temple and celebrating the every other day holidays. She was also well known for her spotless room due to daily and sometimes twice daily vacuuming sprees, and her frequent hair washings.

There are too many times to remember to account in one premature eulogy. As a group we spent many a night sleeping on the floor of a social lounge while the movie watched us. Shirali became my one a day hug person, making me comfortable with human interaction, and a day without seeing her was a weird day indeed.

Since she isn’t actually dead I don’t have to say farewell friend, but one day we will all perish from this earth. Hopefully we will be old and cratchity and have lived good fulfilling lives. Being a teenager makes us feel invincible, but were not. So don’t do drugs! Or drink excessive amounts of alcohol (but if you do please make it to the toilet), or have lots of premarital sex for money (but if you do please use a condom), and all that junk.

Phew…that eulogy made me feel like someone actually died glad that’s over with.

Oh and here is a nice Bingo Board for the enjoyment of anyone who knows Shirali.

Merry Christmas and Good Evening to all,

Noelle